


Alone and Dying

by Desire the Essence (TitanFodder)



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Domestic Violence, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Smut, Yaoi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-04
Updated: 2015-04-12
Packaged: 2018-03-21 04:07:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3676806
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TitanFodder/pseuds/Desire%20the%20Essence
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>America is on the brink of suicide when he learns how the other countries really see him, so what happens when he sees his boyfriend cheat on him? CanadaXAmerica CanadaXFrance WARNING: Yaoi, some sexual themes, some swearing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi all~ This was my most popular fic, I wrote it almost three years ago during summer school, and I'm still surprised it had so many favorites. But I didn't do anything else during summer school so... Hope you all enjoy~ I haven't done a rewrite yet so if there are any careless little mistakes that need fixing, don't hesitate to tell me.

"We need to stop this issue, it's unjust and inhumane!"  
"Calm down America, no need to be a wanker tis'morning."  
"I'm serious Britain; Saudi Arabia's countrywomen are poorly treated and have no rights. We should invade it and make him stop this sick twisted ritual."  
"When I zhink of ritual I zhink of Englan's demon summoning."  
"NO ONE ASKED YOU FRANCE SO WOULD YOU JUST BUTT OUT?!"  
And thus, the two of them begin the harsh cycle of beating the shit out of each other. America stared dumbfounded at the two as the noise level in the room increased, the other countries attempting to voice their opinions over the sounds of cussing, punches and dirty havoc.  
"They do this every week…"  
"Carm down China, maybe they wirr stop?"  
"I don't think they will anytime soon Japan. After all, they are at it all the time."  
"I think we should feed them PASTA! Pasta is feel-good food! So we will make them pasta Russia!"  
And in no time, Italy was bouncing up and down in his chair, throwing pasta ingredients onto the table in front of China, Japan and Russia, trying to get the three of them to help him make it, but stopping when Russia grabbed his special strand of hair and yanked it right out of his head. China had been clawing away at the table due to the fact that the only thing coming out of Japan's mouth was "Culture" and various things of the sort.  
And then there was Germany.  
His face had turned a bright mixture of blue and red, eyes clenched shut as to shut out the scene before him, but his ears hadn't been so lucky. He was clearly sick of it, but was trying his best to not lash out on the other countries, as he had promised Italy he would try to control his anger. And then he felt himself unable to hold it back anymore, and like a cannon, he fired.  
"VILL YOU ALL JUST SHUT UP FOR A CHANGE AND AT LEAST PRETEND TO BE CIVILIZED?! IF THIS KEEPS UP NOZING VILL GET DONE AND IT VILL HAVE BEEN A VASTE OF OUR TIME! I VILL NOT TOLERATE ZIS SHIT ANYMORE!"  
The room went silent. Britain and France slowly made their way back to their chairs without another fist thrown. Italy packed away his ingredients for pasta and almost started crying softly. Russia handed Italy back his hair, even though it more than likely wouldn't do anything now. Japan sat back, looking down to his lap with an ashamed look on his face. China pulled the individual splinters of the wooden table from his hands and sat them down on the table. And America stood still at the podium, watching with a shocked look on his face as Germany made his way over to him.  
Germany, now towering over the American, spoke lightly but sternly.  
"Sit down."  
America gulped out of fear of the bigger country, and fell down in his chair.  
Something had been different about this meeting. Almost no one listened to Germany unless he said something right before leaving. So why was this time different? It was probably because he swore this time.  
"Now, vat are you all planning on doing about zis issue?"  
Not a single person dared speak out of turn; in fact, they all raised their hands instead as to not piss off the German any more than he already was.  
A hand came up in the very back, not the hand of one of the allies or the axis powers. In fact, no one knew who he was until Germany gave him permission to speak.  
"I think we should take over Saudi Arabia and impose our beliefs on them."  
"Who are you?"  
"I'm Canada."  
His voice was soft, so soft that he could barely be heard, even with the noise level at negative zero. The other countries watched him with content looks on their faces, seeing as though the misunderstood, quiet and meek country was the only one brave enough to raise his hand and speak.  
"I see. And does anyvone else have somezing to say?"  
Everyone looked around at eachother, and not a single other hand was raised.  
"Good. Ve vill go through with your plan Canada."  
The meeting was now over. Everyone had left, whispering fondly about Canada and rudely of Germany. Well, everyone had left except for America. He sat in his seat in the meeting hall, holding a hand to his head in uttermost confusion. No one would listen to him today. Weren't they his friends? He wasn't sure why he'd ask himself that, of course they were his friends.  
On his way home, he stopped at McDonald's for a burger, since that was the food that made him feel better in situations like this. But for some reason, he was in no mood. He sat the bag down in the passenger side of his car, and with a rather dramatic sigh, he drove the rest of the way home.  
Something about knowing his brother would be there when he got there made him feel somewhat better. Canada had this way of sensing when America was feeling down, so he would come over, share a few passionate kisses with him, tell him everything would be alright, and America would sleep in his arms.  
It was nothing more than a brotherly love they had when they were together, but something in the back of America's mind told him that he wanted Canada to be more than his brother. And after all they'd been through, one would think that he would've made his move on the Canadian, but he still didn't tell him how he really felt.  
He pulled into the driveway, headlights off, and shut down the car. He picked up the bag and walked inside, setting it down on the counter and smiling sadly once he saw his brother sitting on the couch in the living room.  
"Bad day ay?"  
"Yeah, very."  
He sat down next to him and felt Canada's arms wrap around him gently.  
"Want me to do anything about it?"  
America's smile brightened a little.  
"Yes please."  
And almost as soon as Canada placed his lips on America's, he felt like everything would be better the next day.  
But it wouldn't be.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the kudos, hope you enjoy more as it comes.

Sunlight burned holes through America's eyelids, and made him jolt up, only to lay back down when he felt a lack of warmth from the little white-blonde country who slept with him the night before.  
"Are you awake yet?"  
His voice had only been a whisper, but it was enough to get his brother up. America leaned over him and kissed him gently, tasting the maple-syrup-stained lips and running a hand through the soft locks of his love.  
"Mmmmm good morning, U.S."  
"And to you too, bro."  
America sat up, looking down at Canada, who was still lying under the covers looking up tiredly at the other.  
"Want anything specific for breakfast yo?"  
"Nnnneh... Pancakes please."  
"Okay then."  
He smiled and stood up, pulling a spiderman robe over his naked body, then looking back to the Canadian in his bed. He smiled and kicked the blanket off from on top of him, sitting up and yawning.  
"Thanks bro."  
America smiled back at him, then walked down to the kitchen, pulling out some pancake batter he had stored in the fridge from a couple days before and some bacon from the freezer.  
"Bacon pancakes, makin' bacon pancakes~ Take some bacon and I put it in a pancake~"  
He started the griddle up and fropped down some pancakes with bacon in them.  
"Bacon pancakes, that's what it's gonna make~ Bacon pancaaaaaaaakes~!"  
He smiled to himself as he watched Canada came down from his bed room in one of America's hamburger shirts.  
"Oh, America, I'm going over to France's this afternoon. He wanted me over there to hang out for a while."  
America shrugged.  
"It won't be for a few more hours. Don't worry, I'm not leaving yet."  
"... Okay, but before you go, I really need to talk to you."  
"No problem. I'll be here."  
Breakfast was unusually quiet; Usually the two would talk about Canada's mistake of Justin Beiber, or how England would end up drunk in America's basement, but that didn't happen today. They just stared at eachother.  
"So... Canada..."  
"Yes?"  
"I, uh... have a confession to make... but you have to promise not to laugh at me."  
"Why would I laugh?"  
"..."  
"Okay, I won't laugh, but please tell me."  
"... I think I love you."  
"Bwahaha well I'd hope so! I am your brother you know!"  
"o9my2o4xromq834gmn THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT. -_- "  
"... What do you mean?"  
America sighed, leaning over the table and kissing him. Canada blinked a few times, wondering what was so different until he realized that America meant like 'lover' love.  
"America?"  
America sighed and slumped back down.  
"You hate me now, don't you?"  
"No not at all. I just... wasn't expecting that."  
He stood up, walked over to the American and wrapped his arms around him, snuggling in his hair and closed his eyes.  
"I love you too."  
Three in the afternoon now, Canada left and America was just lazing about in his bed, watching Spongebob Squarepants and eating cheesepuffs. The phone was ringing off and on, starting to annoy the hell out of him, so he picked it up and listened a moment before speaking.  
"Yo."  
"America? Where the hell are you?"  
"Ahh Britain my man what'da'ya need?"  
"YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE HERE FOR CHARITY WORK TODAY NOW WHERE ARE YOU?!"  
"Oh shit..."  
He grabbed his cellphone and looked at the calendar, noticing that it was June 7th, the day they were going to work out the world hunger situation previously discussed yesterday.  
"HURRY UP YOU WANKER. Pfffffft no wonder no one likes you."  
And then the phone clicked and shut off.  
He scrambled to his feet and out the door, Britain's words echoing in his head.  
"No wonder no one likes you."


	3. Chapter 3

America felt kinda bad for being late, but then again, this was the only meeting he didn't really pay any attention to. In fact, he missed the whole world hunger part all together. And, to top it off, he only remembered a tiny bit from the Saudi Arabia incident. Nothing else from the meeting whatsoever.  
He'd finally finished his chores Britain gave him and began packing up to go back home when he looked over and saw Russia and China talking about off the wall stuff. And soon after he watched China leave, then walked over to the Russian.  
"Hey Russia."  
"Oh, привет, America." (Translate: Hello)  
"Yeah, um…. I have a question."  
He swallowed hard and thought about what England had said earlier today.  
"Do you like me?"  
And only when the Russian laughed did America realize how he took it.  
"NOT LIKE THAT! I MEANT AS A FRIEND!"  
And soon the laughter died down, and Russia recomposed himself to answer.  
"Америка, (America) I am friends with nobody. Only mother Russia. And to be honest all I want to do is punch you in the face."  
America stared wide-eyed as the bigger country walked off to his car, thinking again to what England said.  
"No wonder no one likes you."  
At that thought, America just shook it off, knowing that Russia just plain doesn't like people.  
"It isn't true Britain. I'll prove it."  
He turned around quickly, only to scream and fall on his ass when he saw how close this person was to him and he didn't even know it. Then he looked up and recognized the face hiding behind the pale hair and glasses.  
"Damnit Canada you scared me."  
"I'm sorry."  
"Who are you?"  
Canada snapped.  
"I'M CANADA DAMNIT YOU STUPID BEAR."  
The bear shut up and it's face turned blue from embarrassment.  
"Anyway, when did you get here?"  
"Oh, I was here the whole time. I came with France."  
"Oh….."  
America looked around and noticed the tall Frenchman talking to Britain, probably at the threat of being pummeled by Germany if they dare start arguing. And of course, Germany was right there, watching them like a hawk. And keeping an eye on the Italian next to him, who was sitting on the ground cross-legged being bored.  
"I don't think you should talk to France bro."  
"Why not little bro?"  
"Because he's…. odd…"  
"Pffft you grew up with him so I'm pretty sure I can handle a few minutes with him."  
"Well, don't talk to him about anything personal."  
America didn't understand why Canada was stuttering so much, but he didn't question it. Like the time Canada was stuttering when he was cutting wood with a chainsaw. Don't ask, don't tell.  
"Okay, well I can always talk to him later then."  
"Okay then."  
Canada smiled and squeezed the bear that was still in his arms. And the bear let out a squeak.  
"Well, I'm going to go home Canada. Do you want to come with?"  
"Actually I'm going to stay at France's for the night, okay? We're gonna watch a movie together."  
America, once again noticing how Canada was stuttering, smiled.  
"Okay then, have fun."  
And with that Canada was off to do something America wouldn't ever expect.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Forgive me for the shortness, but gotta update.

Early the next day, Canada and France showed up on America's doorstep, apparently because that's where he wanted to be. The sun was bright once again and America stepped outside to greet them.  
"Hey France. Hey li'l bro."  
"Salut l'Amérique. " (Hi America)  
"Hello eh ?"  
America smiled at Canada as he let himself in, then looked to France.  
"Can I talk to you for a minute France ?"  
"Sure, mon cher."  
As soon as America was sure Canada was inside, America burst out.  
"Do you like me ?"  
And of course, France laughed, totally misunderstanding him. But before he had a chance to correct himself, France spoke up.  
"Je suis désolé, (I'm sorry) America. But I'm already catering with another loved one, but of course, with their permission, I could cater to your needs too…"  
He felt France's warm, slightly creepy rape-stare and he backed up.  
"No, I meant as a friend."  
France's smile slowly disappeared and he looked over America with a weird look in his eye.  
"By all means no. I'm only an ally of yours because of your brother."  
As France marched off, America felt like Canada and France had an odd bond. But then again, Canada was raised by France so he really had no room to accuse them of other things. Even so, he couldn't get the thought out of his head.


End file.
